


Revenge

by firetop



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-05
Updated: 2004-08-05
Packaged: 2019-05-31 19:46:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15126608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firetop/pseuds/firetop
Summary: Enemies are made in the most unlikelyplaces.  And sometimes they come back.





	Revenge

**Author's Note:**

> A copy of this work was once archived at National Library, a part of the [ West Wing Fanfiction Central](https://fanlore.org/wiki/West_Wing_Fanfiction_Central), a West Wing fanfiction archive. More information about the Open Doors approved archive move can be found in the [announcement post](http://archiveofourown.org/admin_posts/8325).

Title: Revenge

Author:  Fire Top

Rating: ADULT  (one of these days I’ll write something that everyone can read)

Spoilers:  Up to Noel

Summery:  Enemies are made in the most unlikely places.  And sometimes they come back.

Disclaimer:  They don’t belong to me.  They belong to A. Sorkin and NBC.  I am not making any money out of this.

Authors note:  Yes I’m doing it again.  Josh is getting hurt.  Anyone who takes offence I am sorry.  There are some strong themes in here.  Just a warning.  Please send feedback to sdsqrd@hotmail.com.  I promise I am working on something that is a little lighter than what I’ve been posting so far.   Thanks for reading.

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 

Any second now.  Joe had called and said that He had just left the building.  That means that in about a minute the target would be walking past me and then I make my move.

The three of us have been planning this for over a year already.  We really wanted to go after the bitch but that would have been too hard.  She was too well protected.  Of the other three that caused this one had left the area, no sense in going after that one.  Then there were two.  The nigger and the Jew.  The Jew was easier to get to.  And he was the fucker that had hit the button and ruined our lives.  

My musings are cut short as I see him walk by.  This is it.  I finish tying my shoe lace.  The street is empty except for the two of us.  I start jogging and get the syringe ready in my left hand.  I jog along the street until I catch up with him.  It was perfect.  By the time the needle was in his ass and the plunger pressed we are at the corner with the van doors open.  He stumbled and I catch him, tossing him into the waiting van.  The door closed.  We got him.

 

"Good morning everyone."

"Morning mister President."  

President Bartlett walked into the office and looked around at his staff.  "Everyone take a seat."  He sat down as did everyone else.  "Hey, where is Josh?"

At this the rest of the people look around.  "We have no idea sir.  I’ll have someone call down to Donna and have her find out."  Leo said as he walked over to his office to look into it.

"That works.  He probably finally gave into that cold and over slept this morning.  Okay, so what do I need to know?"

The meeting lasted less than ten minutes and Josh still hadn’t showed up.  Toby and C.J. made their next stop Donna’s desk.  They walked over to her, she was on the phone.  "Josh, wake up!  You are late."  She said into the phone and hung up.  She looked up at the three people around her desk.  "I keep getting his answering machine."

"Don’t worry.  I got some free time.  I’ll go take a drive and make sure he is ok."  Toby reassured.  

"Ok.  If he is really sick, just let him to stay there."  C.J. said.  

"Will do mom."  Toby left to grab his coat and keys.

 

"Josh?"  Toby knocked on his door one last time with no answer.  

"Hey, what’s going on?"  A man that looked like the super came up stairs.

"I’m trying to see if my friend is ok.  He didn’t show up for work and his not answering his phone.  Can you let me in?"

"Is it anything illegal?"

"I promise you, no."

"Sure, let me just get the key."

The Super came back a few minutes later and let Toby into the apartment.  Toby looked around and saw nothing.  The bed didn’t even look slept in.  Toby pulled out his cell phone.

 

"Mr. McGarry, Toby is on line five."

"Thanks."  He picked up the phone.  "Toby?"

"He’s not here."

"Who?"

"Donna couldn’t get a hold of Josh on the phone so I went over to his apartment.  He isn’t here.  It doesn’t look like he made it home last night."

"Could he have had a date last night?"

"You have to ask Donna."

"Ok.  I’m going to send some people over to look over the apartment.  You get back here."

"Yes sir."

 

Josh came to with something pounding into his side.  He tried to curl up and protect his body but that just left his back exposed to the pounding.  Through the haze of pain he realized that he was being kicked.  "Oh shit."  He mumbled.  

"Hey he’s awake."

"Good.  Tie him up over there."

Josh felt himself being dragged and then being hauled to his feet by his arms.  Those were restrained above his head.  Leaving the rest of him exposed.  He was cold.  It was then that he realized that all he wore where his pants.  ‘This is not good.’  He looked around.  There were three other people in the room.  All young men.  They looked familiar, but he couldn’t place them.  "What do you want from me?"  He asked.

"Shut up."  And the dark haired one back handed him and punched him in the stomach.

Josh’s head whipped back, and the world blurred for a moment.  He got nauseous and before he could stop himself, he vomited all over the place.

"The fucker just puked on me.  Get that bucket of water."  

Josh tried to focus.  Then the cold water hit him.  After that was a series of blows that pushed in back into oblivion.

 

"Where is he?"  Leo asked getting more frustrated by the minute.  

"He had no dates last night that any one can tell.  We called any one that we know of that he might be seeing.  No one saw him last night."  Toby said.

"He left here around 1 am and walked home.  The D.C. Police are looking along the route home."  Will added.

"He hasn’t turned up in any of the local hospitals or the morgue yet."  C.J. chipped in.

"Well that ’s some good news."  Leo said sarcastically and then shook his head.  "Ok.  C.J.  Let’s not let the press know too much yet.  Are there a few people you can trust?"  At her nod he continued. "Let them know what’s going on.  Tell them we need to know if anyone saw anything.  Any street contacts they might have.  We need information.  Will, Toby.  I want you two to go and see if he has any enemies.  Ask the secrete service to get a look at the hate mail I’m sure that he has gotten.  Ask Donna to look into if he was working on anything recently that might have ruffled a few feathers."  Leo took a deep breath.  "I’m going to talk to the president."

 

"Mr. President."

"Yes Leo.  Have you found out why Josh missed our meeting?  I am deeply hurt over this."  Jed tried to joke.

"Mr. President.  We don’t know where Josh is.  He never made it home last night.  We checked with girlfriends and the such and he wasn’t there either.  The police are canvassing his route home.  There have been no reports of him at any area hospital or the morgue as of yet.  We are checking into enemies he might have now."

"Damn.  How could this happen?  I want all of you to be extra careful.  Do we know if this was something against me or against him or random?"

"We don’t know yet sir.  I have a call from the police chief in about an hour with an update.  Hopefully we will know more than.

"Ok.  Leo.  I want in on this.  Keep me informed."

"Yes sir."

 

"Get me Danny."  C.J. Called to one of her staff.  A few minutes later he showed up.

"What’s up?"

"Come in and sit down."

Danny came in and closed the door behind him.  "What’s wrong?"

"Josh never showed up for work.  He never made it home last night.  No one knows where he is."

"What can I do?"

"I need this kept quiet.  Do you have some people who might be able to help us?  You know.  Talk to some people who might not talk to the police but would talk to you?"

"Yeah I know a few guys who might be able to help.  I won’t tell my publishers yet about this."

"Danny.  Thanks."

"No problem.  Are you ok?"

"Just worried.  Get back out there.  I’ll be there in a few minutes."

"He’ll be fine."  Danny kissed her on the cheek and then left the office.

 

Conscience slowly came back and he wished that it wouldn’t.  He was in pain.  Almost as bad as when he was shot.  Maybe worse.  At least then it was localized.  His whole body burned.  He was still hanging by his arms.  His shoulders hurt.  He must have dislocated them when his legs stopped supporting him.  It hurt to breath.  And he couldn’t open his left eye.  Actually there wasn’t a part of his body that didn’t hurt.

"You don’t look so tough now."  A voice taunted him.  

"What- what do you want?"

"Just for you to know.  You ruined our lives.  One month in jail.  Do you know what it was like in there for us?"

"For 30 days we were beaten."  This was another voice.  Each word was punctuated by a blow to the side.  "But you know what the worst was?"

"Please stop."  Josh pleaded.

"Shut up." A third said.  This voice came from behind him.  Josh tried to make out what some of these guys looked like but his vision was all blurry.

He felt a blade against his skin.  Then his pants, belt and underwear fell away. "Oh god.  Please.  What do you want from me?  Don’t do this."  Tears were falling.  

He was grabbed at the waist.  And felt hot breath by his ear.  "This."  It whispered, before Josh’s life exploded before his eyes.

 

"Where are we?"

"No where Mr. President."

"What do you mean Leo?"

"No one knows anything.  No one saw anything, no one heard anything.  There are no notes.  There are no traces.  Nothing."

"God Dammit! It’s been close to 24hrs that we are guessing at."  Jed pounded on the desk.  "What is everyone doing?"

"Mostly waiting sir.  The police are still searching.  They think they know where he was taken from and they have a set of tire tracks that could be a skid.  Area residents thought they heard a car skid around the time but as that most of them were asleep it isn’t very reliable."

"Is the press still here?"

"Yeah."  

"Have C.J. Tell them what we know.  I want Josh’s picture plastered everywhere.  Anyone who has seen him, I want a call.  How is the hate mail angle?"

"Not good.  Lots of them.  But nothing about kidnapping.  Toby and Will are still looking at them all."

"Okay.  I’ll be down later to talk to everyone."  Jed sat down.  "Leo, all I want to do is ask Josh what he suggests we do in this situation."

"I know sir.  We are doing everything possible."

"Where is Donna?"

"She is sitting with Toby and Will."

"Is she?"

"As we all are."

"Okay Leo.  I’ll talk to you later."

 

There was screaming.  Who was screaming?  If he could just get that person to be quiet maybe the pain would go away.  It finally dawned on him that he was the one screaming.

 

His body was pounding.  Head, back, front, arms, legs, ass.  Everything was on fire.  He couldn’t think.  He had to get away.  From everything.  He had to escape.  Where was help?

 

They were all sitting in a conference room.  There was coffee and some sort of food.  But no one was interested.  The ringing phone made them all jump.  Toby was the closest.  "Uh huh?  Ok.  We’ll be right there."

"C.J.  I need you to come with me to check something out in the mail room."

"Sure Toby."  As they started walking out of the room she asked.  "What is it?"

"A box was just left along the west gate.  It was addressed to Joshua Lyman.  It is not a bomb.  They moved it inside and are not going to open it till one of us gets there."

They both looked over the box before Toby went to open it.  "Hey is that?"  C.J. never finished her sentence as she saw what was in the box.  "Get 911 here not."  She yelled as she helped Toby claw open the box.  

With the help of the other men in the room they laid the naked, bloody, broken form of Josh Lyman on to the floor.  Toby took off his jacket and ripped off his shirt to cover his friend’s body.  

"Josh."  CJ she spoke to him while trying to check a pulse.  "Wake up Josh.  Come on.  You are safe.  We got you."  There was one but he wasn’t breathing. 

In moments the room was filled with people.  Some one must have told everyone upstairs what was found.  Toby and CJ were still on the floor with him as the EMTs were trying to get him ready for transport.  "Toby, you go with them.  I want a phone call every 15 minutes."

"Yes, Leo."  And Toby ran after the medical personal.

"CJ.  I want you to talk to the press.  Will, the president will be making a short speech later today.  Donna, you back at the office to inform the rest of the staff what’s going on.  I want today to be an easy day.  If you have a chance.  Take a nap or a shower and change your clothing.  I promise to keep everyone informed.  I’ll be with the president."

 

"At 10:35 am a package was found on the west side of the house.  It was addressed to Josh Lyman. It was scanned for explosives, none where found, and the box was brought inside.  Toby Zeigler and I were called to open the box."  CJ took a breath before continuing.  The contents of that box would haunt her for a while.  "In side the box was Josh Lyman.  He was naked and covered in blood.  He was unconscious and not breathing.  We started to administer CPR.  EMT’s arrived soon after to take him to Georgetown hospital.  We do not have his condition at this time.  The president will speak later, and I will let you know his condition.  I sincerely hope that you all join me in saying that your best wishes and prayers are with Josh at this time.  Thank you."  And CJ walked off the podium as people yelled questions at her.  She had to get out of there.  She ran to her office closed the door and let the tears overtake her.

She did not hear the knock on the door, nor the opening of it.  But soon she was wrapped in a comforting embrace.  And she heard the words of comfort from Danny.

 

He called every 15 minutes like he promised he would for the past hour and a half.   He had no news.  They had brought him in.  He had spent less than 10 minutes in the emergency room before they whisked him away to the operating room.  Secret service agents took up residence outside the OR.  Toby had finally asked for someone to let him know what was going on because the president was waiting to hear from him.  That was five minutes ago.  A woman in blood covered blue scrubs came up to him.

"Mr. Zeigler?"  Toby could just nod.  "My name is Dr. Kathy Anderson.  I’m one of the doctors working on your friend in there.  I hear they president wanted to know what was going on."

"Is he?"

"No he isn’t dead.  I’m going to be honest, it looks bad.  I need to go back in there.  I’m going to have the doctor from the ER come up here to talk to you in a few minutes.  I will be back to talk to you as soon as I can.

 

"Toby you got any news?"

"Yes sir.  I just got done talking to the ER doctor that looked at him first.  It’s not good, according to one of the doctors that is operating on him."

"What’s the story?"

"Both shoulders dislocated, left arm broken in three places, right arm in one.  Both wrists are broken.  Left knee shattered.  Right leg broke in two places and a broken ankle.  Four broken ribs, internal bleeding, not sure of what organs yet.  His lungs collapsed.  There is a concussion, broken collar bone, assorted bruising.  A few cuts that need to be stitched closed."

"Toby.  There is something else."

"You sitting Leo?"

"Yeah."

"Raped."

"What?"

"Raped.  He has something shoved up his ass.  It was hard enough to cause tearing and bleeding.  And it wasn’t just once."

"Toby are you ok there. Do you want some one there with you?"

"I don’t know Leo.  I don’t know.  He has been in surgery for over two hours now.  They say it doesn’t look good.  What are we going to do Leo?"

"At this moment we are going to wait and pray.  Our guys in the labs are going over the box.  Maybe we can get something off of it.  I’m going to send C.J. over to sit with you for a bit."

"Okay.  Don’t tell the president yet.  Wait till I hear from the surgeon."

"He is waiting for the first lady to come home."

"Okay Leo.  I’ll call you when I have more."

 

It was seven hours later that Josh was wheeled out of surgery.  Toby and CJ both jumped when they saw his gurney leaving.  Dr. Anderson waylaid them and directed them back over to the waiting area.  "He is being taken to post op.  After that he will be moved to a private room.  Are there any family members that need to be notified?"

"That’s being taken care of by the president.  He is calling Josh’s mother."  CJ answered.

"I’m sure you are curious as to his condition."  AT their nods she continued.  "They told you about what they noticed down in the ER.  The internal damage was bad too.  We removed his spleen; his kidneys were bruised as was his liver.  Both lungs were punctured by the broken ribs.  There is also major swelling around his brain.  We put in a shunt to try and lessen the pressure.  We took samples from his rectum from the assault.  We found both semen and wood splinters.  We removed the splinters and fixed the tears.  We have him on a respirator, and we are trying to replace the lost blood."

"What are his chances doctor?"  CJ asked.

"Honestly, he made it through surgery.  We weren’t sure of that a few times.  He is in a coma now.  That’s the best.  It’s a way for his body to heal.  It’s still touch and go.  He is running a fever.  So we have him on some strong antibiotics.  I need to go and make sure he is set up in post op.  I’ll let you know when you can visit him."

 

Toby, CJ.  Thanks for coming back."

"There was nothing that we could do there.  They are going to call us when they move him to a room."  CJ confirmed.  "I have a room full of press that’s waiting for me."

"How much are we telling them?"

"I don’t know.  Still in critical condition."  She shrugged.  And left the room.  She honestly didn’t know how much to tell them.  She was going to wait to hear the questions and go from there.  After this they were to head up to oval office and talk to the president and the First Lady.

 

"Sir, you might want to call the doctor."

"No Toby.  I want to hear it from you. "

"I don’t know if I can sir?"

"Toby Please."  The first lady sat down next to him and held his hand. Everyone was in the room.  Including Donna, sitting next to him.

Toby stood up and started to pace.  "According to the doctor his left arm broke in three places.  Right in one.  Both shoulders dislocated and both writs fractured.  There were rope burns so they think he was tied up and hung by his arms.  His collar bone was broken.  There were four ribs that were broken.  They damaged his lungs which both collapsed.  His left knee cap was shattered.  Right leg has breaks in two places.  His right ankle was fractured.  There was numerous bruising all along his body.  There is swelling around his brain, and they have a shunt put in to help relieve the pressure.  They have him on a respirator.  He was struggling to breathe so they made it easier.  They removed his spleen.  There was bruising to both kidney and a tear in his liver.  There was a large knife wound on his back that required 32 stitches to close up"  Toby had his arms around himself and was pacing faster.

"Toby you have to tell them."  Leo encouraged.  

"No."

"Toby."

"Fine."  He exploded.  "The bastards then decided that it wasn’t enough to beat him with in an inch of his life they decided to rape him to.  Not once, not twice.  But at least three times.   And then to do more damage they used a piece of wood.  He had splinters in his ass.   They had to use over one hundred stitches to sew up all the tears.  Splinters"  He repeated before he collapsed in a chair crying.

There were no dry eyes in the office.  Will had his arms around Donna.  Leo and CJ both had hands on Toby’s shoulder.  The president and his wife were consoling each other.  After a few moments the president cleared his throat.

"Leo, I don’t want the rape out there.  There is no reason for the press to know.  Where are we on finding out what bastards did this?"

"They are cross matching fingerprints that they found on the box in the lab.  They also have semen samples in the lab."  Leo answered.

"Do we need to put someone in Josh’s office?"

"No."  Toby blurted.

"Toby, we don’t know how long he will be incapacitated."

"We went how long with out a VP.  We don’t need anyone right now.  Let’s wait."

"Ok Toby.  I want to visit."

"We figured you would.  He has a private room in ICU and two armed guards.  We don’t know if these people are coming back for him."

"CJ, Toby, Donna.  I want you three to close up for the day.  I want you home and resting."

"Yes Mr. President.  But don’t you think I should-"CJ started.

"Alright.  CJ you’re with me.  You can talk to the press there."

 

The only sounds in the room were the study beat of the heart monitor and the sound of the respirator breathing for him.  Jed and Abby took the only seats in the room.  Abby reached out to grab the bits of fingers that were peeking out of the full cast on his left arm.  There was a full cast on his right leg, while there were just splints on his left.  His Left knee was well bandaged and elevated.  He had a bandage around his chest that they assumed was from the broken ribs.  There was a blanket that was over his waist and groin, for some semblance of modesty.

His right arm was in a half cast but was strapped to his body in order to not jar the shoulder.  His head was shaved and he had a bandage wrapped around it.  There was a tube leading from the back of his head.  There was also one leading up his nose and one in his neck.  There were leads connected to his head monitoring his brain activity. And one leading to his chest monitoring his heart beat.  His skin was pasty white and there were dark circles around his eyes.  The only movement was his chest rising and falling in time with the respirator.

"Oh Jed."

"Shh Abby.  I need you to look at his chart.  Tell me what you think?"

Abby got his chart and looked it over.  She looked at the monitors and then again at the chart.  She sat back down. "It doesn’t look good.  His body will heal.  There is a bad infection that he is having a hard time fighting.  They are watching his fever.  It is pretty high.  There is not a lot of brain activity.  That has them worried.  He wasn’t breathing when they found him.  There might be brain damage there might not.  They won’t know till he wakes from the coma. If he does."

"I’m keeping his office empty.  You hear that Josh.  I believe that you will come back to us.  Your position is staying open.  You come back to us kid.  We need you."  They sat for close to 30 minutes in silence when there was knock on the door. And CJ walked in.  

"Mr. President.  Danny would like to come up to sit with Josh for a while.  Not press related but as a friend.  Also Zoey is at the residence waiting for you."

"You are right CJ.  Yeah Danny can visit.  I don’t want press in here though.  You are the filter.  I know that is going to be hard but I know you can do it.  What did you tell the press?"

"I told them his listing; I did not catalog his injuries. But told them there was internal damage as well as a bunch of broken bones.  That was all.  If his condition changes then I’d let them know.  They want to know about his office.  I told them that the president is working on it."

"Good work CJ.  Give us a few more minutes."

"Yes sir" and she backed out of the room.

"Josh.  We are all here for you.  Just come back to us.  I know it will be hard but we will be here for you.  For it all."  Abby said as she kissed his cheek.

"Josh, I told you I need you.  We are holding a spot for you.  Don’t make us wait too long.  I will be back.  I promise.  You fight son.  You fight" Jed kissed his forehead and walked about of the room with his wife.

As soon as the president left CJ and Danny made their way into the room.  "Oh god CJ, you didn’t say it was this bad."  

"This is not for the press, Danny.  You wanted in as a friend.  And here you are."

"Off the record.  Do you know what happened yet?"

"Not really.  The labs are still working."

"Labs?  All for fingerprints?"  He looked over at CJ.  "There was more than just Fingerprints on the box.  Something with DNA?"  CJ stayed quiet.  "Sexual? Rape?"

He put a hand on her shoulder and she looked up at him with tears in his eyes.  "No one will know from me.  There is no reason."

"Thanks Danny.  We just want to protect him.  He’s already been through enough.’

"I understand.  Let me drive you home and camp out on your couch.  You shouldn’t be alone."

"You are right.  I haven’t slept in close to 48hrs.  Thanks Danny."

He knew she was troubled when she didn’t object.  Danny laid a hand on Josh’s arm.  "Hang in there Josh.  We are all rooting for you."  One of the monitors started to beep louder.

"Be good." CJ said as she kissed his cheek.  Then all hell broke loose.

 

Josh’s body started to jerk as a nurse flew in.  "Get the cooling blankets we need to get his fever down."  She yelled into the hall.  "Help me hold him down."  She told CJ and Danny, as she flung the blanket to one side and injected something into his bottom.

Other nurses came in and covered him with blankets.  CJ looked over at one of the monitors.  His fever had hit over 105.  She knew that was not good.  Josh’s body started to calm down from the seizure and she and Danny where told they could let go.  She looked at all the monitors.  His heart was back to normal, but his brain activity was a little more active.  "It’s a good sign."  The nurse told CJ.  As the made sure he was appropriately covered again.  "He’ll be ok.  I promise."

"Thanks."  She mumbled more perturbed by the moment.  Danny led her out and downstairs into the car.  If anyone the press that was still there thought it was odd to see CJ being led some place they didn’t make any comments.

 

Josh stood alone.  It was a grey, misty place.  One area was lighter than the rest.  And from there came a figure.  "Joshua."  It called.

"Zaydi?"

"Yes, tatala.  I’m here."

"Where am I?"

"In between."

"Am I dead?

"Not yet.  But that is a choice for you to make. "

"What am I to do Zaydei?"

"Well you can come with me, and leave everything else behind.  All your friends, who are closer to you than family. Or you can go back to be with them."

"But that will hurt."  

"Yes it will Joshua.  But you can be strong.  I know you can.  It won’t be easy.  But you can make it through.  There are many people down there who would want to you to come back.  But the choice is yours."

"I don’t know Zaydie."

"The easiest way is to give up.  And you know how I feel about giving up Joshua.  I didn’t give up.  Your grandmamma didn’t give up.  We are survivors.  You too can be a survivor.  It wasn’t the same hell that we went through but its close enough.  It was your own personal hell.  You haven’t given up yet.  And I don’t think that you should yet,"

"I know Zaydie.  But I don’t think I can do it. "

"Think about it Boychick.  But you will have to decide soon."

 

Toby and Donna stood outside as the medical staff worked on Josh.  He had gone into cardiac arrest.  They had removed the shunt yesterday, but he had remained unconscious.  There was no living will so they kept him hooked up to all the machinery.  He wasn’t breathing on his own either.  After a few minutes the alarms were shut off.  And the nurses and doctor filed out of the room.  They were told they could go back in.  Donna and Toby sat for a few more minutes before deciding to head back to the office.  Donna bent to kiss him when she noticed movement behind his eyelids.  "Toby.  His eyes."  She called.  Toby walked to the other side of his friend.  

"Come on Josh.  Wake up."  He started to say. As he laid a hand on his friends shoulder.  After moments of struggle, Josh’s eyes flew open.  "Donna go get a doctor and then call Leo."  He then moved into Josh’s terrified line of site.  "We got you Josh.  You are going to be ok. You are on a respirator.  Don’t fight it.  You need the help."  He noticed that Josh was trying to move his arms."  Josh lie still.  It’s ok.  He laid a hand on his chest.  We got you know.  Just relax.  No one is going to leave you.  I’m going to stay right here.

 

Once again the room was busy with activity.  They tried to move Toby out of the room as the doctor and nurse took his vitals, but every time Toby got out of his line of site, or his hand moved from the top of Josh’s right arm his heart beat would rise.  The doctors realizing that an elevated heart rate was bad allowed Toby to stay.  Donna informed him that Leo wanted a call ASAP.  She also told him that Charlie and Zoey were here.

"Josh I need to go call Leo.  Donna, Charlie, and Zoey are going sit with you is that ok?  Blink once for yes twice for no."

Blink blink.

"Too many people?"

"Blink"

"How about just Donna?"

Blink Blink

"Charlie?"

Blink

"Okay.  Donna can you have Charlie come in here by himself.  Thanks."  He looked back down at the bed.  I will be back as soon as possible.  I will not let Charlie leave your side until I get back.  Bartlett be damned," he whispered in his ear.  Charlie soon walked in.  "Hey Charlie.  Can you sit here by Josh and keep him company while I make a phone call."

"Yes sir."

"Thanks. Josh I’ll be right back."

Once outside he was confronted by two angry young women.  "Why can’t we go in there?"  Donna asked.

I don’t think he is comfortable around women right now.  So let’s humor him.  I’m going to call Leo.  Please just stay out for a bit."  And Toby made his way to the phones.

 

"Toby.  I’m going to get the president on the line too.  He wants to know what’s going on."

"Yes sir."

"Toby, it’s the president how’s Josh?"

"After nearly dieing from his heart stopping, he is awake and alert.  He is terrified.  Charlie is sitting with him.  He didn’t want Donna or Zoey in there with him."

"I understand.  I’ll be over later by myself to check in on him."

"Yes sir.  I’m going to stay here with him.  I don’t want him to be alone."

"You are a good man Toby.  I’m going to send CJ over to talk to you about what we are going to say to the press."

"That’s a good idea.  I’m going to send Zoey and Donna back."

"I’ll see you later tonight." Once the president hung up Leo started to speak.

"How is he?"

"Honestly terrified.  He doesn’t want to be alone.  But he didn’t want Donna to sit with him.  I’m worried."

"You hang in there for him.  Be his lifeline.  We will try and keep everyone out.  But I know that congressmen and senators have already asked me about visiting."

"He is not up to visitors yet.  I don’t even know how he is going to react to the president being there."

"I understand Toby.  I think the president is also aware of that fact but wanted to see someone who he has high esteem for."

"Let me go, so I can send Charlie back to the president."

"Good idea Toby.  I will be coming by tonight with the president.  Do you need me to get anything for you?"

"Naw.  I’ll be fine."

 

When he got back to Josh’s room he found Charlie still sitting by the bed but Josh had his eyes closed.  "They gave his something for the pain.  They also hooked him up so the medication will be dispensed at every two hours."

"Thanks for sitting with him Charlie.  The president wants you, his daughter and Donna back."

"I figured as much."

"Thanks again Charlie."  

Toby was then left alone in the room.  The steady sound of the machinery was soothing and soon the hours that he was putting in caught up with him and he fell asleep.

 

The beeping grew louder and Toby jumped, unaware of where he was.  He looked around and everything made sense.  Then he saw Josh’s eyes were open, and his heart rate was picking up.  He once again put his hand on Josh’s arm and moved into his line of site.  "Josh, calm down."  Josh’s arms tensed.  "Relax.  You are fighting the machine again.  Let it breathe for you.  You aren’t strong enough to breath on your own.  You need to let us help you.  I know you are scared because you can’t move.  But you were very badly hurt.  Your neck is immobilized because your collar bone was broken.  As where your arms and legs.  Both your shoulders were dislocated.  We need to keep them immobilized for a few more days.  Just until the bruising goes down.  There is also a feeding tube.  I know that’s uncomfortable.  But until they are sure you can breath on your own, and you eat on your own they are going to feed you this way.  There is also one of those other tubes, which we aren’t going to discuss right now.  The CJ is going to be here soon."  Josh started to tense again.  "I won’t let her in here.  But she wants to make sure you are ok."  

Blink blink

"You realize I’m going to be going up against CJ for you.  How about a peek into the room"

Blink

"You are a good man Josh."

Luckily CJ knocked on the door just as the drugs kicked in for Josh.  "Josh I’m going to go outside to talk to CJ.  Have a nice nap."  And Josh gave up the battle to stay awake.

"Your timing is perfect once again.  He is being very picky as to who he wants to see him.  So far anyone who is female is not on the list."

"I got you.  But I am going to talk to him tomorrow when he is a wake."

"Do we have any more information yet?"

"Yeah the computers are back up.  We arrested the bastards who did this."

"Who was it?  Did you find the reason?"

"It was revenge.  Remember a few years ago we took Charlie out to a bar and Zoey and Mallory came?  Remember that Josh pushed the panic button and got the three jerks arrested for harassing Zoey?"

"They did this?  As payback?"  At CJ’s nod.  "Why him?"

"He was the easiest to get to if you believe it."

"Has anyone called Sam?"

"Yeah.  Right before I got here.  He is flying in tomorrow."

"That’s good.  That should cheer Josh up a bit."

"Do you need anything?  You want me to pick something up for you?"

"I’m good.  Maybe when Sam is here tomorrow I’ll sneak home to shower and change and head into the office for a few to make sure everything is going ok."

"Well if you need anything let me know."

"Thanks again CJ."

 

"Sir, Josh should be up in a few minutes.  Do you have a problem if I was to run to the bathroom before he does?  He doesn’t take well to waking up alone."

"Toby, take your time.  We aren’t going any where."  The president dismissed him.

He and Leo were talking when they saw movement and muffles from the bed.  Jed and Leo got up to make sure Josh was ok.  There was rapid eye movement behind the closed eye lids.  He seemed to be trying to break free from what ever was holding him.  His heart started to beat faster.  "He’s having a nightmare Leo."  Jed laid his hand on Josh in an attempt to wake him up.  "Josh you are having a nightmare.  You need to wake up."

Josh’s eyes flew open.  The site in front of him did not help.  His heart rate increased and he started to choke, trying to breath on his own, fighting the respirator.  Toby cam in and saw the scene.  He didn’t think.  He maneuvered himself between the president and Josh.  "Sir, please step back."  Was the only bit of curtesey he gave the man.  He pressed gently on Josh’s upper arms.  "Joshua.  Look at me."  Toby saw tears and fear in his friend’s eyes.  "Josh, you need to relax.  Stop fighting the machine.  Just relax.  There is no reason to be afraid.  It was just the president and Leo.  They wanted to see how you are doing?"  Josh blinked his eyes twice.   "You don’t want them in here?"  Two blinks.  "Josh I can’t kick the president out.  How about asking him to stand away from the bed for a bit?"  More tears and two blinks.  "Toby looked apologetically at the president.  This was probably going to cost him his job.  Josh’s heart started to rise.

A nurse ran in as alarms started to sound.  She didn’t give a damn who was in the room.

"Leo, why don’t we go get Toby some coffee."

"Thank you sir."  Toby mouthed to the president.  "Josh they’re leaving.  You got to calm down.  You are going to have more problems if you don’t calm down."  It wasn’t helping.  He was fighting the respirator and tears were free flowing.  "You are safe Josh, Please calm down."

The nurse had enough she threw off the blanket and injected him in the ass.  "It’s a sedative Mr. Zeigler."  She explained.  She knew what he was trying to do.  

"Josh, they gave you something to help you sleep.  It’s going to be ok.  Tomorrow will be better."  Toby took some tissues and started drying his friend’s eyes.  "Shh, just relax.  I’m not going any where.  I’ll be here when you wake up in the morning.  You’re safe."  He continued to soothe as the nurse rearranged the blankets and tried to make Josh more comfortable.  Soon he gave in and sleep won.

"Can you stay with him for a bit?  I need to go apologize to the President."

"Was that who was in here?"

"Yeah.  I work for him.  So does Josh.  That’s if I still have my job."  Toby shrugged as he walked out of the room.

The president and Leo were waiting for him outside.  "Mr. President.  I am deeply sorry for-"

"Toby?"  Jed cut him off.

"Yes sir?"

"Don’t worry about it.  I realized my presence was more than he was able to handle at that moment.  I am the one who is sorry.  Do you have everything you need?  Is there anything at work that you are having trouble with.  Do you need some time off to help take care of him?"

"I’m okay sir.  Just really worried.  CJ told me about the boys who did this.  She called Sam Seaborne.  Hopefully Josh will let him stay so I can go shower and change.  I’m going to also head in to the office and make sure everything is ok.  I have talked to Will, and thank god everything seems to be nice and quiet so far."

"That’s good Toby.  I am holding Josh’s position for him.  I have full faith and confidence in him to get well and come back to work."

"I will let him know that next time he is awake."

"You are a good man Toby.  If you need anything.  Please don’t hesitate to ask."

"Yes sir.  Thank you sir."  And Toby was left alone in the room with Josh.

 

"How are you doing Mr. Lyman?  My name is Dr. Buchman, It’s nice to see you awake."

"Josh, I’m going to take a walk.  You talk to you doctor."  Toby made his way out of the room before any argument could be started.  

The doctor took a seat.  "To be honest with you we weren’t sure about you.  You’ve been here for close to two weeks now.  You spent the first in a coma.  When you were brought in here you where unconscious and weren’t breathing on your own.  Your lungs had collapsed.  Fragments from your broken ribs punctured them and cause the collapse.  There was a tear in your liver along with bruising on your kidneys.    There is still a tinge of blood in your urine. But it’s a lot better than it was.  We aren’t too worried about that.  W e had to remove your spleen though.  It was too badly damaged.  You lost more than half your blood volume.  We’ve topped you off.  There was a head injury and a lot of pressure around your brain.  We put a shunt in and it helped, we have since removed that.  You will have to regrow your hair.  Sorry about that.  We don’t think there is any brain damage but we won’t be sure until the neurologist can come in and see you.  That will probably be later today.  I know the respiratory therapist was in already, he will be back later today.  We do want you to start breathing on your own.  The longer you are on the machine the higher chance of infection you have.  And with out your spleen, well.  You already have one infection in your body that we think we got a handle on.  We don’t want another.  I also have a feeling you are tired of laying in that bed and not moving.  When I leave we will move the bed so that you can be elevated to a 45 degree angle.  No more.  If your chest starts to hurt, you are going back to the 20 degrees that you are at now.  The neck brace will be on for another week.  You broke your collar bone.  While there isn’t much we can do we can try and immobilize your neck and shoulders so you don’t move too much, and allow it to start to heal.  Both your shoulders were dislocated so there is duel purpose for them being immobilized.  We are going to get someone in here to start you on some strengthening exercises for the shoulders and your legs.

Your arms and legs will be in the casts for at least 6 more weeks.  Your left arm was broken in three places.  Right in just one.  Both of your wrists were fractured.  You right leg was broken in two places.  Your left knee cap was shattered.  That was replaced.  And your right ankle was sprained.  There is a long cut on your back that we had to sew up.  A proctologist will be in tomorrow to talk to you about the damage that was done to your rectum.  There was a lot of damage.  We held off on a colostomy.  We will see how you do after we get you on solid food.  We believe that is where the infection is stemming from.  We tried to get all the splinters out.  The proctologist will be able to tell you more."

Josh was confused.  What was wrong with his ass?  He couldn’t even feel it. 

"We called your psychologist, and he is going to stop by to talk to you. We figured you’d be more comfortable with that.  Its hospital policy that before a rape victim is released they must speak to a psychologist.  Steven said that’s he’d be in, in two days.  When he figured you’d be off the ventilator.  I’ll let you rest.  Tomorrow we are going to remove the stitches in your stomach."

Josh never heard the doctor leave.  Nor noticed Toby as he came back in.  The machine dispensed the medication and Josh floated blissfully into sleep.

The respiratory therapist, John, came back later that day.  Josh, more determined now, took two breaths on his own before it got to be too much.  "Good Job.  How about we do this.  I don’t think you are strong enough to go with out the ventilator, but, the only way you are going to get stronger is to practice.  So we are going to put the machine on backup.  Basically it will only breathe for you if you don’t.  It will wait 20 seconds.  If you don’t breath then it will breathe.  Sound like a plan?

‘Thanks you’ Josh wrote on the board.  

"No problem.  We’ll get you out of here soon."

"Josh, we need to talk."

K

"There are a lot of people who want to come and visit you.  Is that ok?"

?

"Besides everyone from the office, there are a bunch of senators and congressmen and lobbyists who are calling."

Office, yes.  Rest?

"Okay.  Donna’s been collecting the cards and flowers at your office.  She wanted to come by tomorrow, I’ll have her bring some."

Who else?

"CJ said she will stop by tomorrow as will Danny."

Press?

"No as a friend.  He as here a few times while you were in a coma.  He’s not a bad guy for a journalist. He hadn’t written one word about you except to say that you are in their papers heart and prayers."

Good man

"Yes he is."

"Who else while out?"

"Just about everyone.  Donna, CJ, Will, Charlie, Zoey."

Pres b?

"Yeah and you wigged out while he was here."

Shit.

"You’re telling me I almost had to kick him out, because you started to stress too much."

Job?

"Yes.  We both still have one."

Call I sorry.  

"You can call in a few says and tell him yourself.  Your meds should be kicking in soon.  Tomorrow is going to be crazy.  

Blink.

"Is there anything you want me to get you from your house?"

underwear?

Toby laughed.  "Not yet."

Clothing?

"Josh they can’t get a hospital gown on you yet.  The suit is out."

Lay here naked?

"Not much I can do.  I’ll see about getting you something more than the sheet they have you covered with."

Tru friend.

"Hey anytime."

Go home

"I promised you I would stay here.  And I’m not going to leave.  Let me lower the bed a little so you can get some sleep."

 

"Well josh you’d be happy to know that the guys who did this to you are behind bars for 27 years.  No chance for parole."  CJ informed him as she sat down.  It was just her and Toby.  

How found?

"How we found them? Or you?"

Me

"You sure Josh, it isn’t pretty."  Toby asked.

How?

"We were sitting upstairs waiting for word.  We were going through your hate mail.  Toby got a call from the mail room that a box came.  Your name was on it.  I went down with him and when we opened the box, you were in it, tied up, naked, and bloody.  We called emergency services and the Secrete service helped us start CPR."  CJ looked down at her hands.

Upon hearing who found him, and the state he was in, Josh started to get sick.  "Shit, CJ, go get a nurse, he going to be sick.  He’s going to choke." 

"Josh, try to hold it."  Toby was rubbing Josh’s exposed arm.  It wasn’t enough

Josh’s body convulsed and choking sounds were heard as he started to vomit.  But the ventilator was in the way.  Vomit could be seen in the breathing tube.  "It looks like the tube is coming out earlier than we thought.  Toby, stand behind him and help us role him as soon as we get the tube out."  Connie said.  One of the nurses turned off the machine, while Connie went to take hold of the tube.  "Three" she called as she pulled the tube out.  Toby and another nurse rolled Josh on to his side as the vomit fell out his mouth.  A nurse came with a vacuum and helped to suck the rest of the vomit out of his mouth.  While he was gagging, Connie also removed the feeding tube.  "That should help."  Toby stood there rubbing his friends back as he finished being sick.  "CJ why don’t you go wait outside.  I’ll be there in a moment."  CJ nodded and left the room.  Toby saw Josh crying again.  "It’s ok.  It doesn’t bother me, it doesn’t bother CJ and it shouldn’t bother you.  We care about you Josh.  All of us.  We have seen you drunk, sick, and shot.  You would want to be here for us too if the roles were reversed.  Just relax.  The nurses will clean you up and get you comfortable."

"Tired." Josh rasped. 

"Okay.  No more visitors.  I’ll keep you company.  Donna left a whole other bag of cards from people.  We can make fun of them."

Toby walked out and sat down by CJ in the waiting area.  "I didn’t want to tell him."

"I know CJ."

"Is he going to be ok?"

"I think so.  I hope so."

"You seem so calm with all this.  Are you ok?"

"Yeah.  I’m ok.  Jealous almost."  He smiled.  "He has all those nurses giving him a sponge bath now, and changing his sheets.  .  Ten bucks he walks out of here with at least three phone numbers on his casts.  Go home CJ.  He’ll be ok. "

"Toby, what’s bothering you?  I know there is something."

"I feel guilty"

"Guilty?  You weren’t even there."

"Don’t I know it?  Sam invited me to go with them, but I was busy."

"Toby, I was there.  I could have gone up and got my own drink, but Zoey was already standing."  There is no one to blame.    Only the morons who did this in the first place.  There is no blame to be placed.  Why don’t you go home?"

"I promised him to keep him company.

 

Josh lay in bed.  He’d been here for a month already.  He was ready to go home.  They were sending him tomorrow.  Not like he was going to be alone there either.  All he wanted was to be a lone.  Since he woke up he was never alone.  Besides the armed guards that stood outside his door, Toby was constantly by his side.  He finally got him to leave him at night.  He was tired of it all.  People constantly asking him how he was feeling.  The lie cam easily now.   He was fine.  

Yeah right.  Anyone with half a brain would know better.  Worse was Steven.  He kept wanted Josh to talk about what happened.  There was nothing to talk about.  He didn’t want to talk about.  

Did I remember being beaten?  Oh yeah.

Do you remember being raped?  Definitely but I’m telling any one about that.  No I don’t, is the answer they all get. 

At least they allowed him to continue to work.  He felt grateful that they had held his office for him.  So he telecommutes.  It wasn’t so bad; He’d be doing that for the next two months as he recuperated.  They had hired him an in home nurse.  He could blame them.  His arms and legs were still in casts.  And it killed him that he couldn’t even go to the bathroom on his own.  Urinals and bedpans had become his worst enemy.  Well second worst.  The first was his own body.  

He tried not to eat anything.  But that didn’t work.  They threatened the feeding tube again.  So then it was just liquids.  Still they weren’t happy.  His body hated him.  It wanted solid foods, it craved meat and bread and vegetables.  But it would complain at expelling the waste.  So he fought it.  Limiting it to small amounts.  So his body started to comsume itself.  He knew he was slowly killing himself.  He would do it quicker, if he was able to.  Maybe when he was home.  That was his hope.

 

It was Sunday.  Toby was over.  It was his first Sunday home, and Toby came over to watch the game with him while the health care worker took her day off.  So what that he showed up at 9am.  It was now 1pm.  The game they were waiting for started at two.  "Josh I’m heading to the deli.  You want anything?"

"Naw."

"Josh, you have to eat.  Even with the casts you weigh less then you did."

"A plain turkey sandwich."  Anything to get him out of the apartment.  This was his moment.  Toby would be gone for a while.  The deli would be busy.    He had it all planned out.  The medication was all in his room.  As was the exacto knife.  Art class came in handy once more.  He’d been practicing with it since he got home.

He watched Toby leave and counted to twenty before moving.  

The pitcher of water in his room was warm now.  But that was ok.  He emptied all the pill bottles along with the Tylenol that he had found in his night stand.  He took ten at a time.  Soon they were all gone.  Next came the knife.

It was nice and small it fit inside the casts so nicely.  He didn’t feel the blade he slid it down one wrist and then down the other.  All feeling had left his body.  He was tired.  His arms slumped over the sides of the wheelchair.  Blessed oblivion had found him at last.

 

"Josh, we got company."  Toby called as he let himself back in the apartment.  He was surprised to see CJ and Danny at the corner deli, waiting for their order.  They were going to surprise Josh and Toby with lunch at keep them company.  They were back in 30 minutes.

"Where is he?"  Danny asked.

"Probably in the back.  I’ll get him.  Just put the stuff down some where."

"You think I can talk him-"

"CJ, Danny!"  Toby yelled from the back room.

Josh was already on the floor. Toby was trying to find a pulse.  "CJ"

"On it."  She took her cell phone out and walked into the bathroom for towels.

"What happened?"

"The pill bottles are all empty, there is blood pooling on the floor and an exacto knife.  What do you think happened?"  Toby snapped.  "No pulse."  He started CPR.  Danny took the exacto knife and started to cut away bits of the arm casts.  

CJ came back in with towels.  "On its way."

"Dammit Josh, don’t do this."  Toby berated as he tried to get josh breathing.  His lips and finger tips already started to turn blue.  

Danny had cut a line up the cast on the right and tore it open with pure adrenaline.  CJ applied the towel while Danny moved to the left. Pressure was climbing and Danny got the second cast off a few minutes later, he them moved to do compressions as Toby just worked on getting air into josh.  Danny took over the chant "Breath you bastard.  Don’t even think of quitting."

By the time the emergency personal got there. The towels were blood soaked and they still didn’t have a pulse.  

The EMT’s quickly got Josh into the ambulance and it was once again to the hospital.

 

"Zaydie?"  He called.

"We have nothing to say to you Joshua.  You disappoint us."

"Zaydei, I’m sorry.  Please."

 

He felt like shit.  He went to wipe his face and noticed he was restrained.  He pulled himself up and saw he was restrained to the bed.  Then it hit him.  He was still alive.

"Shit."

"So you finally woke up.  You done scaring us?"

Josh ignored his therapist.  He didn’t want to talk to anyone.  He didn’t want to see anyone.  He didn’t care.  They would take his job now.  Lock him away.  He closed his eyes in defeat.

"Josh you can’t ignore this.  You are alive.  And unless you start talking you are going to stay like this for a long time."

I can ignore this he thought.  So what.  Do what you want with me.  

"I’ll be back tomorrow to talk.  Think about what you want, Josh.  We do want to help you."

As the door closed the tears fell.

For two days people came to visit.  He ignored them.  Two days Steven came to talk to him.  Josh ignored him.  Two days they bought him food to try and eat.  Josh ignored them.  The third day they put in a feeding tube.  He didn’t utter a sound.  He laid there defeated.  If the will was gone maybe the body would slowly follow.  They kept him restrained to the bed.  His casts were replaced with splints so his wrists could be bandaged.  The cuts were deep but stitches solved the problem.  The pills also didn’t do enough damage and the stomach pump took care of that.  

Toby hadn’t come to visit.  That much he was aware of.  Danny had at least yelled at him.  Told him if they were out for ten more minutes he would have suffered brain damage if not death itself.  So he had calculated properly.  At least there was one thing he did correct.  Damn the short line at the deli.  

He lost track of when he fed or when he got rid of it.  People came and went.  It all blurred.

 

"Josh."  He ignored it.  People called his name all the time.  His head was turned until he looked into the one face he didn’t have heart to see.  Josh closed his eyes to stop the tears.  Here was a man he did not want to disappoint.  The man who he believed in.  The man who gave him a wonderful job.  A good friend.  The president  

"Josh, why are you doing this?"  Jed Bartlett kept his hand on Josh’s cheek so he couldn’t turn away.  "Please talk to me josh.  I’m not here are the president I’m here as Jed, a friend.  The guy you traveled across the US with.  Remember all the late nights?  We did have some good times."

Josh tried to block the voice.  There was nothing but friendship.  No condemnation, no pity, no sorry.  Just some one who wanted to help.  "Please Josh.  Help me understand this.  Because that’s what my problem is.  I want to understand why?"

"Please leave."  Josh requested quietly.

"I’m not leaving.  You need someone to be with you.  And now it’s me.  You’ve chased everyone else away.  There is no one else in here.  No Agents, no secrete service.  It’s just us.  Please talk to me."

"Nothing to say."  The tears were going to start soon.

"Come on Josh.   We aren’t going to let you stay and waste away here.  You are too smart Josh.  And we are not; I’m not going to let you go like this."  The tears were free flowing down Joshes cheeks.  

Jed knew it was against hospital policy but all he saw was one of his children who needed comforting.  He undid the restraints around Josh’s wrists.  "C’mere."  And he wrapped Josh in his arms.

 

"I can’t anymore.  I can’t do this.  I’m so tired."

"I know Josh.  But you aren’t alone.  We are all here for you."

"Please don’t."  Josh tried to pull away.

"Why not?  We care about you."

Josh was getting tired of all the coddling.  "I’m so angry at all you!"  He cried out.  "Sam for moving away.  Toby for not being there.  CJ for not getting her own drink.  Charlie for not being the one attacked.  Mallory and Zoey for lying to us about you telling them that they could go.  And you."  Josh took a breath.  "It was your damn idea in the first place."  Josh crumbled in on himself and continued to cry.

            Jed rubbed his back.  He understood Josh’s anger.  All the people that he had mentioned had already expressed their guilt about the situation.  Including himself.  

            "And I’m angry at myself."  Josh continued.  "For being angry in the first place.  I know that it’s none of your fault."

            "Josh.  It’s not your fault either.  The only one to be blamed for this is the ones who did this to you."

            "How can you even stand to touch me?  I can’t stand to be me."  Now that the flood gates had been opened everything was pouring out.

            "Is that why you did this?  Josh, listen to me son."  Jed cradled Josh’s face in his hands so that they could look each other in the eye.  "You did nothing wrong.  Being raped doesn’t make you less of a man or dirty.  Rape is about control.  Right now they have the control.  You are letting them do this to you.  Fight Josh.  Don’t give in."

            "It’s so hard.  My body isn’t helping.  I can’t do this.  Why did you save me?"

            "Because we care Josh.  You are our son, brother, friend.  Just because you gave up don’t mean that we do.  Hold on.  It will get better.  The casts will be off in a few more weeks.  You’ll be able to move around on your own a bit more.  It will get better.  I promise.  I know you feel useless and helpless.  But you are not.  You’ve still got your mind.  The work that you have been doing till now has been top notch.  So you work from home for a while.  It’s no big deal.  Will you try Josh?  Try to hold out a bit longer?"

            "Yes sir."  Josh mumbled.

            "Steven will be coming in tomorrow.  Talk to him.  He is not going to let you out of here otherwise.  We’ll take this one step at a time.  First we are going to get you out of here."

            "Yes sir."

            "Lay back down.   Unfortunately I’m going to have to put the restraints back on.  But I’ll stay until you fall back asleep."

            "Thank you sir.  Can I ask you a favor?"

            "Sure Josh."  The president said as he secured Josh’s wrists.

            "Can you ask CJ, Danny, and Toby to visit?  I owe them an apology."

            "They are pissed at you."

            "I know."

            "Don’t be surprised if they hand you a bill for a punching bag and hospital."

            "What happened?"

            "Danny and Toby destroyed a punching bag at the gym.  That was enough for Danny.  But Toby tried a wall next.  Broke his knuckles.  He’ll be fine though.  Just go to sleep."

            "Yes sir.  Thank you sir."  And Josh closed his eyes.


End file.
